The twins were four, and I was sick of feeling like I was barely keeping my head above water. I remember sitting at the kitchen table one night, telling myself, “This is the year.” The year I was finally going to get on top of things.
I wrote out a list of goals that sounded sensible enough: book a massage once a month, start an exercise routine, eat healthier, and give meditation another go (for what felt like the billionth time). It looked good on paper. The kind of list that makes you feel like you’ve got a plan.
But the truth is, even when I ticked those boxes, nothing really changed. I’d still lose my patience with the kids. I’d still collapse into bed at night feeling wrung out and guilty. The massages gave me an hour of escape, but no real relief. Meditation just left me frustrated, my mind wouldn’t stay still and I’d end up feeling like I’d failed at self-care too.
Looking back now, I can see that what I was really craving wasn’t another item on a to-do list. It was a way to feel steady in the middle of the chaos, to stop living in survival mode, and to actually enjoy my kids instead of just managing them.
This blogcast is available in both written and video format to support different learning styles. Choose whichever works best for you!
📖 Read below
The Survival Mode Most Parents Call “Normal”
Between juggling work, parenting, groceries, bills, and the endless mental load, I was constantly running on empty. I’d push through the day with coffee, then wind down with wine (or ginger beer, I am in Broome, after all!) just to make it through the night routine.
Most nights the only “me time” I had was after the kids went to bed, except half the time I’d fall asleep beside them, because they wouldn’t settle on their own. Then I’d wake up realising I’d missed my one quiet moment of the day.
And beneath the exhaustion was something deeper: I felt like I’d lost myself in parenthood. Everything revolved around everyone else’s needs – school, appointments, meals, routines. I was holding it all together, carrying the mental load, and by the end of the day there was nothing left for me.
At night, my mind would run on repeat:
- Am I hurting my kids or stuffing them up?
- Am I failing them because I’m too tired, too impatient, too stretched thin?
- Am I even doing enough?
I was constantly worried about their future, while also battling guilt about how I was showing up in the present.
I thought this was normal. I thought I was coping.
Until I wasn’t.
The Wake-Up Call
Chronic fatigue stopped me in my tracks. I couldn’t push through anymore. My body had been whispering for years and now it was screaming.
I thought I just needed more rest, more self-care, more medicine. But nothing was working. No matter how much I slept, how much meditation I forced myself to do, or how many doctors I saw, I was getting sicker by the day.
I stopped being able to exercise. I stopped being able to work. Even the basics of daily life felt impossible.
Meanwhile, I was desperately trying to “fix” the fatigue without realising the connection between my constant stress, the endless worries, and how it was all feeding my illness.
That’s when a friend gently suggested I look into the parasympathetic nervous system – the part of our system responsible for connection, safety, and regulation.
So I started researching.
The Breathwork Reset That Changed Everything
I found breathwork through The Reconnected, who have taught over 100,000 people this style of breathwork, just 15 minutes a day. It sounded simple. Achievable. I thought, What have I got to lose?
By this point, I had already exhausted the Western medical system – seen numerous doctors, had countless blood tests, was taking about ten different tablets a day, and had gone through several rehabilitation programs. I was ready to try something different.
What I found wasn’t just rest, it was relief.
Here I was thinking I was just going to get more energy, but instead I started noticing a shift in myself and in my parenting. There was finally space in my mind to cope with all “the stuff.” Life didn’t feel so overwhelming and consuming anymore.
Things that used to send me spiralling – like a phone call from school saying my child had hit another kid – started to feel like water off a duck’s back. I could respond instead of react. I could think more clearly. I wasn’t being hijacked by emotion every time something went wrong.
And the most surprising part? I started noticing all the things I already knew about behaviour and parenting, the things I’d read, studied, even taught but hadn’t been able to put into practice. You know that feeling when you know better but still do the thing anyway? It’s so frustrating.
But now, it was like the knowledge had finally sunk into my body. I could do better. Not perfectly. But more often. More gently. More intentionally.
From Seeker to Sharer
I remember thinking, What is this sorcery?
As someone who had spent a lifetime seeking answers to mental health struggles, I had all but given up on ever finding something that truly made a difference. Then along came breathwork and it was helping me in every area of life.
Better mental health.
Better energy.
Clearer thinking.
Less reactivity.
After experiencing that shift, I knew I had to study it. Not to teach, not at first but to understand it more deeply.
I enrolled in training through The School of Breathwork and over two years, I completed more than 450 hours of study, practice, and supervised client work. It was life-changing.
And of course, by the end, I knew I had to share this with other parents, especially those raising neurodivergent children.
Because this practice is gentle. Simple. Easy to fit into your life. And it doesn’t require you to “still your mind” or wait for a quiet house.
It meets you where you are, in the chaos, in the overwhelm, in the realness of parenting.
Honestly, I still pinch myself that I found something so easy and so powerful. I wish every parent knew about it. And I feel especially passionate about sharing it with parents of neurodivergent kids because we do have it harder, with more challenges, more responsibilities, and more invisible load than most people will ever see.
And yet, we matter too.
We deserve support too.
And we can thrive but only if we have something that supports us from the inside out. For me, that’s breathwork.
✨ I can’t wait to share something special with this beautiful community.